Too drunk!
Too drunk!

Last night at the bar it was karaoke night
Yeah, everybody down there was feelin' all right
They got big margarita pitchers, two-for-one (yum-yum)
They were feelin' footloose and ready for some fun
When I signed up, I was ready to go
But they didn't call my name for an hour or so
Damned if they didn't make me wait too long
I was in no kind of shape to sing a Jon Bon song.

Too drunk to karaoke
Too drunk to karaoke
If you keep on drinkin', you're gonna be
Too drunk to karaoke, just like me
Too drunk to karaoke
Too drunk to karaoke

Well, the place got rockin', temptation was strong
All the pretty girls kept a eggin' me on
Well, I shoulda kept my flip-flops glued to the chair
But no, I jumped right up and slicked back my hair

Too drunk to karaoke
Too drunk to karaoke

Well you can sing and shout ‘til you sound real good
You can terrorize the whole damn neighborhood
But when you hit that stage with that mic in your hand
You better pace yourself, son, if you wanna have fans

Too drunk to karaoke
Too drunk to karaoke (play it, boys)

If you ask me, hell, I killed that song
When I looked around, everybody was gone
Except a couple of bouncers 'bout half my age
They grabbed the microphone and threw me off the stage
You're too drunk to karaoke, that's what they told me
You're too drunk to karaoke, how can that be?
You don't have to be good, don't have to be refined
You just have to be a legend in your own mind
Don't have to rehearse, or even sing on key
Just prove that theory of drunkativity

Too drunk to karaoke
Too drunk to karaoke (look at me!)
Too drunk to karaoke (just like me)
Too drunk to karaoke…
(that's what I'm talkin' about)